My friends, they love my intelligence
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
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