we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
