DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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