It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Randomize
