It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
