Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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