Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize
