you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
