Cold hands, warm shart.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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