omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
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