He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
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