no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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