I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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