On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
