You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
