There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
third nipple confirmed
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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