Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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