great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
