At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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