guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
