actually, I'm a sock model
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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