I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
