I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
