That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
