i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
4 words: hood of his car
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I look excited, but its just a facade.
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