exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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