Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
