I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
there was a trapeze. enough said
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize