if i died would you start the facebook group?
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I think people are normalizing furries
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
