And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
