Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
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