Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
