On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Randomize
