It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
