i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize