Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
