i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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