You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
