Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
