i permit you to call me
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Randomize