Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Randomize
