I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
