Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
