Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I want her autograph on my taint
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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