You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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