Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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