I'm passing your future prison.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Randomize
