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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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