talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
