Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
